Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
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