??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
3pm strippers are depressing
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
