doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
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