im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
