Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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