plz talk dirty to me
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
