Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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