he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
