So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
