are you so shy because you have an std?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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