I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize