The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
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