If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
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