you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
