So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
