I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize