Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
