It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
