marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
