i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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