do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
