Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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