Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
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