Having a random hookup so left but love u
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize