What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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