Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
