im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize
