I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize