should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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