Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
two words...techno handjob
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
