Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize
