It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Ketchup is God's man juice
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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