They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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