can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
