College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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