Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I FOUND THE LEGS
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize