please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
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