very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
