I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize