Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
It's official drugs can't kill me
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
