i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
