Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize