The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
sex in a hospital.. check
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
