just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
