Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize