ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize