CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
then he tried to convert me to islam
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
