You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize