She said her name was "party"
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Randomize