I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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