Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
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